Sarcastic Clapping

{April 30, 2010}   Clueless conscienceless morons!

Tell me I was dreaming. Tell me I did not just witness a nationally televised show air an hour that included the lesson that cops are trained to lie, and therefore are devil betrayers that must be killed.

Unfortunately I watch GH so instead of dreaming I was actually living a nightmare.

What in the holy hell did I just watch?

Jason told Kristina and Molly that cops were trained to lie and they bought that crap? They immediately decided that Dante was evil and out to hurt poor innocent Michael?  Carly….Carly of all people screamed at Lulu about betraying her family for a guy she likes?  Sonny, Jason and Carly’s immediate decision upon hearing Dante’s truthful testimony is A – Michael must get out of the country and B – let’s put Carly back on the stand to commit more perjury because she’s so freaking awesome at it?  Lucky actually had to explain to Micahel this whole hiding out thing works better if you stay inside, especially when you are a giant?  (Ok that part was funny but still!) 

And Jason, Sonny and Carly are the heroes of this show? 

God they sunk my battleship!

I have been trying to work out for the past week how Dante telling the truth is on the same level as Jerry Jax/Mr. Craig.  Or why anyone would think that continuing to lie about Michael’s involvement constituted protecting him.  Did they not realize they rattled off about four different defense strategies that would have worked in the five minutes they spent babbling at the judge after Dante spoke?

Michael is a troubled young man.

Michael was in a coma caused by Claudia for a year and has documented brain damage regarding impulse control.

Michael walked in and saw what he thought was his mother and sister being attacked.

For all the talk this show does about Diane being a brilliant legal mind….she couldn’t have argued any one of these instead of risking de-barment for knowningly putting Carly on the stand to lie?  She couldn’t have been successful in getting Michael tried in juvenile court and getting off with therapy and a suspended sentence until he turned 18? 

These dumbasses cause this mess by covering up mitigating circumstances in the first place and then hiding Michael on the freaking island and they think it’s Dante’s fault that Michael might face charges?  Michael being out of the country would have rendered Dante’s testimony null and void?  (Ok it’s the GH legal system. That probably would have happened.) 

Carly….Carly who has never ever used the Spencer name, is about as loyal to Lulu as Noah “Puck” Puckerman is to any girl who won’t give it up, who has put Sonny and Jason before her mother, her current husband and her children’s well being is pissed off that Lulu stuck by her boyfriend?  Carly freaking stuck by Sonny when he shot Lulu’s boyfriend in the chest.  Dante and Lulu are responsible for ruining Michael’s life and not the idiots who put him in this exact situation in the first place? 

And we’re supposed to continue to cheer for these idiots? These are our heroes?   It’s the blind leading the moronic to preach to the idiotic! 

Let me just set these dumbasses straight.  The reason Michael’s life is ruined is because Carly and Jason decided years ago that raising that baby in the mob was a better option than having him raised by the Quatermaines.  A further reason is Sonny had AJ hung on a meathook because AJ was an alcoholic and that brain trust decided that was worse than being raised by a mob boss.  All the times Michael screwed up from the time he was a terrifying mini-Chucky doll till he swung an axe, these numbnuts covered it up, excused it and brushed it off as nothing.  He shot Kate in the chest and they wrote it off as boys will be boys.  The idea of him getting therapy, admitting what he did in court or even apologizing to Kate was seen as a punishment worse than death.  They worried and fretted about Michael wanting to join the family business but used that same business to bribe him into staying with them after he awoke from his coma, used it to get him out of trouble through intimidation and used it to bend the law and get him a temporary driver’s liscene. 

You know…all these things these feckers figured out when he axed Claudia in the first place! 

And now we are so going to sit through months where they whine and moan and try to blame Dante and Lulu and probably Claire for the predicament Michael is in. They will cry and moan about where did they go wrong as parents.  And you know what will happen?  People will line up to tell them they did everything right. They couldn’t have predicted the evilness of Dante.  Everything they did was to protect Michael and mold him into the greatest young man to ever exist.  Oh did I need to put spoiler alert there?  Sorry!  But you know it’s true. 

Clueless morons!

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